Yesterday:

"Househusbandnot?"
Alarm bells (like the ones in the freak's house in Silence Of The Lambs) go off as mrs househousehusbandnot uses my proper name. I try to act cool.
"Er, yes mrs househusbandnot."
"I had a dream last night."
Further alarms, since 1) mrs hhn rarely remembers her dreams and 2) when she does, they are usually about me behaving badly by selling her in a market in Morocco, or burning down an off licence, or eating a wolf without a knife or fork in front of her parents.
"Oh, yes."
"Yes. You came home from work and said that your penis had fallen off in the office, and I was freaking out because you had obviously been waving your penis around in the office, and you were going `Can we focus on the main issue here that my dick fell off today?'"
"Hmmmm."
"But I've realised that the dream was just about me not wanting you to sleep with anyone else."
"Babe, it's not like I am about to sleep with anyone in my office."
"Wrong answer. I think what you meant to say was that you were not going to sleep with anyone else at all."
"Yes, that's what I meant to say." (Got out of that one, NOT.)

And all this on our wedding anniversary. May our dreams - well some of them anyway - not come true.

In other news, in and around the various wedding anniversary events over the weekend - including a great great meal last night [Styx, you would love this place], I saw an old friend of mine on Saturday who I have not seen for two years. It has been bothering me a lot that we had not met up for so long, with some concern that our long friendship had/was...I don't know, just had or wasn't. Anyway, it was a testament to that friendship that we pretty much picked up where we left off. (This meeting was also attended by The Waunch btw who was there to fill in any pregnant pauses - of which there were none - with his thoughts on Bloody Sunday, Jimmy Page's lack of oeuvre since the 1970s, and what cheese you would take to a desert island.) And a deep treat to be reminded that although we sometimes don't see people for too long, friendships last if they are meant to. (No snide comments on this one please people, unless you really feel the Xmas need to take the piss out of me for being honest - a temptation I am aware Madame B will be unable to resist after she has put up the Xmas decorations in the office this morning.)

In further news, went to a party with mrs hhn on Saturday where a man took his shirt off, mrs hhn asked a woman if she was okay because she could not stand up and the woman confessed she had drunk a bottle of port before coming to the party, the host showed us his light saber, I ate pretty much all of the canapes, and mrs hhn had a little dance. All this in Oxshott, which those of you in the know know is possibly one of the strangest places in the world - apart from my wife's dreamworld.